1999 - Great White North Times
Great White North Times
Great White Chris?
Some say he was headed that way all his life.
Edmonton, Alberta
Chris is American, or is he? Old evidence has reappeared to shed a light on Chris' latest move to the Great White North of Canada, begging the question is he now a toque wearing Canadian. Perhaps he will never again say, "USA, #1"? The fact is, he has been a closet Canadian since his younger, thinner years of his youth and now he can finally proudly say with all correct emphasis and pronunciation....."EH!".
Rare photos have surfaced of hosehead Chris belting out the best sounding "Theme From the Great White North" that any American could ever say. He made a great Bob McKenzie back in high school. Chad Weiser comments, "I didn't quite understand his infatuation with the movie Strange Brew, but now it kinda makes sense".
While attending university, Chris wised up, asked out a cute Canadian, and the rest is history. "What do you expect, half the college was Canadian", Chris said. "He was destined to become Canadian" Donna says, "actually, it was his idea to come up here. Chris will fit in just fine. He likes hockey, cold weather, the Tragically Hip, and salt and vinegar chips. But he may need to work on his accent." We asked Chris to comment on the allegations of his Canadianism. He replied "Sure I like hockey but just like any other good American, I like hockey, I don't play it. As for the Bob and Doug McKenzie thing, no comment".
Move to Canada took time
Green Bay, Wisconson, USA
The move to Canada did not go as quickly as planned. Donna left in February and Chris stayed behind to sell the house. They thought it would only take a couple months to sell but that short time turned into 9 months. Some would say nine months away from Chris would be heaven but "I kinda missed him." Donna says. Analysts say it took 9 months due to a buyer's market but insiders say Chris wanted to use his six months of free cable that he won at the Gambler Hockey game. Finally in November, Chris crossed the border, eager to live in the city which honours hockey great Wayne Gretzky, holds the world's largest mall and is home to the Edmonton Oilers. "It was nice to finally be in the same country as my wife, but isn't Dakota Square Mall in Minot, ND the world's largest mall?"
Alberta Job Market Looks Good
Edmonton, Alberta
With Alberta's economy boom, the job market looks good. New government money is being put towards a Student Health Initiative in this province which is a collaborative effort between the School Board and the Health Regions. Capital Health and the Edmonton Public School Board is part way into a 3 year plan at improving elementary school children's health in the schools. Donna Peterson, one of the several Speech Language Pathologists hired on in the Fall reports, "I was placed in the neediest area of the city, Eastwood Health Centre, to work with children in inner city schools." When asked about the efffectiveness of the Student Health Initiative Donna replied, "it is challenging but looks to be very rewarding." Capital Health is still aggressively marketing to hire on more SLPs.
"The jobs are in Alberta", indicates Chris Peterson. "I came up from the USA and chose Alberta out of all provinces because of how it is growing. Immigrations is going to be the biggest hurdle to get through." Negotiations for a position with the A-Channel began after Chris was in the city of Edmonton for only one week. "Immigrations may slow things down and create problems with the job prospects," says Chris "but I'll have no problem. People like me."
Polar Ice Dip
Jacksonport, Wisconsin
Between 175 and 300 people took the plunge at the 13th annual Jacksonport Polar Bear Dip (the number depends on who you ask). Several thousand much warmer people performed the vital role of observer, including several dogs, two llamas and three TV crews. very cold Chris Peterson was overheard saying, "WOOOOOO!" Actual air temperature was 10' F with the water temperature not being too much more than that. "I've wanted to become a Polar Bear since I was in high school, " Donna said, "I'm happy I finally got the chance and could convince Chris to join me." As it turned out, Chris didn't need much convincing. Once he got to the beach he "warmed up" to the idea and was seen to be acting like a goofball, being one of the first to get in and last to get out. Apparently, getting to the beach with nothing but a bathing suit is the hard part. The Petersons plan on finding a Polar Bear club in Alberta. If they can't find one they plan to establish one.
Sign Boy Bids Farewell...
Green Bay, Wis
It was an evening of excitememt and sorrow at the BCA. Sign Boy, a longtime tradition at Gambler games bid farewell to all his fans. Sign Boy dropped the puck on his final game as a heckler in the USHL and was in rare form. One fan made Sign Boy masks for every one in his section. "I am really gonna miss this team and all my fans, but it is time to move on." Sign Boy said as he was overcome with emotion "I love you guys." It truly was a night to remember.
....drives Zam
Green Bay, Wis
A loyal fan of the Green Bay Gamblers for three seasons was given the chance of a lifetime. Sign Boy drove the Zamboni during several games this season. This is an honor that is usually reserved for celebrities. "This is a night I will remember always. Sign Boy is truly honored." the lucky fan said shortly after leaving the ice. Steve the local Zamboni legend said of his performance, "He didn't suck too bad. What I really want to know is why he is referring to himself in third person. What an Idiot."
Stanley Cup in Danger
Eagle River, Wis
The Stanley Cup was nearly destroyed during the annual 4th of July parade this weekend as a crazed fan almost demolished the treasured prize. "I just wanted a picture. I'm not crazy." the fan raved as he was led away by authorities. The lunatic posed as a jounalist to gain access.
Rowing Team Wins Spirit Award
Vermilion, Alberta
The Lakeland Rowing Club hosted the annual rowing corporate challenge to raise money for the hospital. Teams raced, people came out and money was raised. "What was most memorable was the team from the health unit" says Donna, a member of the team from the health unit. "The Freudian Slips had the most fun and won the spirit award, "said Donna, a member of the Freudian Slips". (Note: same team, same arrogant Donna). A man with a pig hat, whom wishes to remain anonymous, indicated "They sucked. They were slow at getting off the dock and they were slow in the water. And even worse, when I told them they weren't going to win the race, they said, `so what, we just want to have fun'. "
Healthy, Wealthy, and Wise
Vermilion, Alberta
Canada is the place to be for outdoor enthusiasts. Two great places for trails are the Vermilion Provincial Park and the 80 miles of trails within Edmonton. Many Canadians are changing their ways back to the healthy, outdoorsy, natural lifestyle just as Donna is doing. "I left the dairy state and the lazy state of mind behind, " Donna proudly says," I have so much more energy with the better sleep now that I don't have to listen to Chris' snoring." Rollerblading, hiking, walking, rowing, and Tae Boxing are the activities that Donna used to get back into shape.
"Hip"
Edmonton, Alberta
Chris and Donna, like to check out Canadian bands whenever they can. "The Tragically Hip were awesome, " says Chris, "they are quickly becoming my favourite band". "I never heard of Farmer's Daughter but I sat in the front row, stood up and acted crazy to get a free t-shirt of theirs." Donna also joined the Folk Club to see other artists such as Maria Dunn and The McDades at the first, hopefully annual, Celtic Festival in Edmonton. Donna looks forward to all the festivals that are in Edmonton and Chris looks forward to getting season tickets to the Edmonton Oilers.
Letters to the Editor
Dear Editor,
I would like to comment on the recent accusations in your "rag" that I am Canadian. As anyone who knows me will tell you I am the most American person they know. Next time I hope you at least check your facts and your sources. On a positive note the articles on Sign Boy are great. He is truly genious.
Chris "USA #1" Peterson
Dear Editor,
It is nice to be back in Canada close to Donna's family. We are looking forward to the new millenium and hope you have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. You are welcome in our home anytime.
The Petersons
Great White Chris?
Some say he was headed that way all his life.
Edmonton, Alberta
Chris is American, or is he? Old evidence has reappeared to shed a light on Chris' latest move to the Great White North of Canada, begging the question is he now a toque wearing Canadian. Perhaps he will never again say, "USA, #1"? The fact is, he has been a closet Canadian since his younger, thinner years of his youth and now he can finally proudly say with all correct emphasis and pronunciation....."EH!".
Rare photos have surfaced of hosehead Chris belting out the best sounding "Theme From the Great White North" that any American could ever say. He made a great Bob McKenzie back in high school. Chad Weiser comments, "I didn't quite understand his infatuation with the movie Strange Brew, but now it kinda makes sense".
While attending university, Chris wised up, asked out a cute Canadian, and the rest is history. "What do you expect, half the college was Canadian", Chris said. "He was destined to become Canadian" Donna says, "actually, it was his idea to come up here. Chris will fit in just fine. He likes hockey, cold weather, the Tragically Hip, and salt and vinegar chips. But he may need to work on his accent." We asked Chris to comment on the allegations of his Canadianism. He replied "Sure I like hockey but just like any other good American, I like hockey, I don't play it. As for the Bob and Doug McKenzie thing, no comment".
Move to Canada took time
Green Bay, Wisconson, USA
The move to Canada did not go as quickly as planned. Donna left in February and Chris stayed behind to sell the house. They thought it would only take a couple months to sell but that short time turned into 9 months. Some would say nine months away from Chris would be heaven but "I kinda missed him." Donna says. Analysts say it took 9 months due to a buyer's market but insiders say Chris wanted to use his six months of free cable that he won at the Gambler Hockey game. Finally in November, Chris crossed the border, eager to live in the city which honours hockey great Wayne Gretzky, holds the world's largest mall and is home to the Edmonton Oilers. "It was nice to finally be in the same country as my wife, but isn't Dakota Square Mall in Minot, ND the world's largest mall?"
Alberta Job Market Looks Good
Edmonton, Alberta
With Alberta's economy boom, the job market looks good. New government money is being put towards a Student Health Initiative in this province which is a collaborative effort between the School Board and the Health Regions. Capital Health and the Edmonton Public School Board is part way into a 3 year plan at improving elementary school children's health in the schools. Donna Peterson, one of the several Speech Language Pathologists hired on in the Fall reports, "I was placed in the neediest area of the city, Eastwood Health Centre, to work with children in inner city schools." When asked about the efffectiveness of the Student Health Initiative Donna replied, "it is challenging but looks to be very rewarding." Capital Health is still aggressively marketing to hire on more SLPs.
"The jobs are in Alberta", indicates Chris Peterson. "I came up from the USA and chose Alberta out of all provinces because of how it is growing. Immigrations is going to be the biggest hurdle to get through." Negotiations for a position with the A-Channel began after Chris was in the city of Edmonton for only one week. "Immigrations may slow things down and create problems with the job prospects," says Chris "but I'll have no problem. People like me."
Polar Ice Dip
Jacksonport, Wisconsin
Between 175 and 300 people took the plunge at the 13th annual Jacksonport Polar Bear Dip (the number depends on who you ask). Several thousand much warmer people performed the vital role of observer, including several dogs, two llamas and three TV crews. very cold Chris Peterson was overheard saying, "WOOOOOO!" Actual air temperature was 10' F with the water temperature not being too much more than that. "I've wanted to become a Polar Bear since I was in high school, " Donna said, "I'm happy I finally got the chance and could convince Chris to join me." As it turned out, Chris didn't need much convincing. Once he got to the beach he "warmed up" to the idea and was seen to be acting like a goofball, being one of the first to get in and last to get out. Apparently, getting to the beach with nothing but a bathing suit is the hard part. The Petersons plan on finding a Polar Bear club in Alberta. If they can't find one they plan to establish one.
Sign Boy Bids Farewell...
Green Bay, Wis
It was an evening of excitememt and sorrow at the BCA. Sign Boy, a longtime tradition at Gambler games bid farewell to all his fans. Sign Boy dropped the puck on his final game as a heckler in the USHL and was in rare form. One fan made Sign Boy masks for every one in his section. "I am really gonna miss this team and all my fans, but it is time to move on." Sign Boy said as he was overcome with emotion "I love you guys." It truly was a night to remember.
....drives Zam
Green Bay, Wis
A loyal fan of the Green Bay Gamblers for three seasons was given the chance of a lifetime. Sign Boy drove the Zamboni during several games this season. This is an honor that is usually reserved for celebrities. "This is a night I will remember always. Sign Boy is truly honored." the lucky fan said shortly after leaving the ice. Steve the local Zamboni legend said of his performance, "He didn't suck too bad. What I really want to know is why he is referring to himself in third person. What an Idiot."
Stanley Cup in Danger
Eagle River, Wis
The Stanley Cup was nearly destroyed during the annual 4th of July parade this weekend as a crazed fan almost demolished the treasured prize. "I just wanted a picture. I'm not crazy." the fan raved as he was led away by authorities. The lunatic posed as a jounalist to gain access.
Rowing Team Wins Spirit Award
Vermilion, Alberta
The Lakeland Rowing Club hosted the annual rowing corporate challenge to raise money for the hospital. Teams raced, people came out and money was raised. "What was most memorable was the team from the health unit" says Donna, a member of the team from the health unit. "The Freudian Slips had the most fun and won the spirit award, "said Donna, a member of the Freudian Slips". (Note: same team, same arrogant Donna). A man with a pig hat, whom wishes to remain anonymous, indicated "They sucked. They were slow at getting off the dock and they were slow in the water. And even worse, when I told them they weren't going to win the race, they said, `so what, we just want to have fun'. "
Healthy, Wealthy, and Wise
Vermilion, Alberta
Canada is the place to be for outdoor enthusiasts. Two great places for trails are the Vermilion Provincial Park and the 80 miles of trails within Edmonton. Many Canadians are changing their ways back to the healthy, outdoorsy, natural lifestyle just as Donna is doing. "I left the dairy state and the lazy state of mind behind, " Donna proudly says," I have so much more energy with the better sleep now that I don't have to listen to Chris' snoring." Rollerblading, hiking, walking, rowing, and Tae Boxing are the activities that Donna used to get back into shape.
"Hip"
Edmonton, Alberta
Chris and Donna, like to check out Canadian bands whenever they can. "The Tragically Hip were awesome, " says Chris, "they are quickly becoming my favourite band". "I never heard of Farmer's Daughter but I sat in the front row, stood up and acted crazy to get a free t-shirt of theirs." Donna also joined the Folk Club to see other artists such as Maria Dunn and The McDades at the first, hopefully annual, Celtic Festival in Edmonton. Donna looks forward to all the festivals that are in Edmonton and Chris looks forward to getting season tickets to the Edmonton Oilers.
Letters to the Editor
Dear Editor,
I would like to comment on the recent accusations in your "rag" that I am Canadian. As anyone who knows me will tell you I am the most American person they know. Next time I hope you at least check your facts and your sources. On a positive note the articles on Sign Boy are great. He is truly genious.
Chris "USA #1" Peterson
Dear Editor,
It is nice to be back in Canada close to Donna's family. We are looking forward to the new millenium and hope you have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. You are welcome in our home anytime.
The Petersons
posted by Hamilton @ 9:35 AM
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